While I didn’t grow up with the Thanksgiving holiday in Australia, I’ve come to treasure this American tradition dedicated to practicing gratitude in a world that constantly pulls our attention toward what’s missing.

Whenever I think about what gratitude truly means, I think of what my dad has taught me.

My dad spent much of his childhood living in the shed you can see in the image above. No sanitation. No electricity. No running water. No floor. He and his brother (my Uncle Bob) slept on hammocks made from potato sacks hanging from the rafters (handy for a high tide). He didn’t own shoes until he was 12 and later spent 50 years milking cows to make ends meet as he raised his seven children (of which I was big sister).

Needless to say, Dad has weathered more than his share of hardships and heartache over the years. He’s endured brutal droughts. He’s grieved the loss of his youngest son, my brother Peter, after his long battle with schizophrenia. He’s supported his eldest son, Frank, as he learned to navigate life with paraplegia. And most recently, he’s had to say goodbye to his beloved wife of 56 years — my mum — to the brutal fog of dementia.

In August this year, I had the joy of taking dad on a cross-country train trip across Australia to celebrate his 90th birthday. Whether sitting in our cabin staring out the train window at the red parched earth or reflecting on our day over dinner, time and time again he would take my hand and say, “Oh Margie, this is the trip of a lifetime!”

Every time he did, he made me present to the gift of that time together and the gift of life itself. My own. My dad’s. Everyones. Dad’s outward expression of gratitude is my dad through and through. As he has said countless times throughout the years, “I feel like the richest man in all the world.” And he doesn’t just say it, he truly means it. He embodies it.

And it’s got nothing to do with his monetary wealth. In fact, he’s never had a lot of it. Dad’s sense of wealth has never been in a stock portfolio (the only stock he ever had were his herd of dairy cattle!) but in the love he’s generously given and received, and in his daily expressions of gratitude for what is, rather than lamenting what isn’t.

Dad taught me that gratitude isn’t something you practice only when life is going your way—when the job comes through, the illness lifts, or long-prayed-for rain finally falls. It’s a discipline for all seasons. The more we practice it, the more it bolsters our resilience and buoys our spirits to rise above the waves when life’s storms roll in. (If you haven’t one lately, it’s coming.)

Here’s the thing about gratitude that research confirms and lived experience proves:

What we appreciate, appreciates.

When we focus our attention on what we’re grateful for, it doesn’t just make us feel better in the moment—it actually expands. Our relationships deepen. Our joy multiplies. Our capacity to meet life’s inevitable challenges grows larger and our ability to find the good even in the hardest of circumstances grows deeper.

In a world that pummels us 24/7 with reasons to feel anxious, inadequate, or ‘left behind,’ it’s all too easy to fixate on what’s wrong, who’s to blame, or how life should be different than it is. Our brains are wired for this ‘negativity bias’ which kept our ancestors alive by constantly scanning for threats. But in today’s world, that same wiring can hold us captive to scarcity thinking, living in a perpetual state of ‘not enough’, always chasing the next thing while missing the beauty and abundance that’s right in front of us. Or at least not appreciating it fully. I’m as guilty of falling into this trap as anyone.

This isn’t about denying hard realities. Rather it’s about intentionally placing our attention on what’s good and what’s right. Doing so expands our capacity – mental, emotional, physical and spiritual – to meet our challenges better and to emerge as better humans.

This has been my personal truth again and again—especially in my toughest seasons, when my expectations and hopes collided head-on with a reality I didn’t want or wasn’t prepared for. In those moments when the world has felt like it’s falling apart, I’ve slipped into what I call an un-gratitude state… feeling angry at life or sorry for myself.

And so this is my wish and prayer for you in this Thanksgiving week:

~ To pause long enough to really see your blessings — you have many, even if some are hiding in plain sight.

~ To look for the gifts and goodness in the people around you, rather than focusing on how you wish they were different.

~ And to recognize that the “ordinary” moments of your life — your health, your morning coffee, a hug from your kids, a friend who checks in — are, in truth, the really big things.

On this Thanksgiving week, I’m thankful for YOU, for taking the time to read this right now.

I’m thankful for everyone who has cheered me on this year, supporting me as I reset my sails to launch The Courage Gap (if you haven’t read it yet, the holidays are coming!) or supported my me in any way.

I’m even thankful for the experiences I’d never have chosen and to the people who’ve given me opportunities to practice forgiveness, empathy and patience. They have helped me to grow ways I couldn’t have without them.

The mystic Rumi once wrote:

“Wear gratitude like a cloak, and it will feed every corner of your life.”

What we appreciate, appreciates. May this week remind us all to focus on what we have, knowing that in doing so, we create more of what truly matters.

Happy Thanksgiving!